Poly Means Many

a group blogging project on the subject of polyamory


14th May 2013 – Amanda took part in a discussion about open-relationships (specifically open marriage) on The Mark Forrest Evening Show, which is broadcast live across 39 Local BBC radio stations. Listen to the discussion here.

Remember the vows? “To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse….” but what happens if another person becomes involved and the ‘forsaking all others’ becomes a mutually agreed ‘open relationship’? We’ll be hearing from the author who’s experienced the cruel reality of living in an open marriage when her husband fell in love with his mistress. Mark’s speaking to The Marriage Foundation and the founder of maritalaffair.co.uk and asking – could an open relationship make your marriage stronger?

26th April 2013 – Stavvers wrote about ‘the perks of polyamory‘ for London’s ES Magazine.

Polyamory — or poly, as most of us end up calling it — is the recognition that it is entirely possible to love, fancy and form meaningful relationships with more than one person at a time. There are a lot of different forms that poly relationships can take: some of us have a regular partner and also see other people; some of us live in three-, four- or more-way relationships; some live in big tribes of partners and friends. The possibilities are endless.

I’d fantasised about polyamory ever since I was a child. I wanted lots of husbands and wives and things. But it was only four years ago, when I was 24, and reading about it on a feminist blog, that I realised this was an actual thing. I immediately rushed out to buy a copy of The Ethical Slut — sometimes called the poly bible — which is a guide to the poly lifestyle. It was another six months or so before I met another poly person, on the dating site OkCupid.

3rd March 2013 – Lori and Amanda hosted an informative session on polyamory at the UK’s only conference for erotica writers and sex bloggers, Eroticon 2013, in London. Listen to the session here.

Polyamory is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Yes, it is possible to love more than one person! Whether you are an erotica writer looking to research polyamory for your writing or someone who’s just wondering how it works, Lori and Amanda will provide you with a useful introduction to this fascinating aspect of romantic/sexual relationships.

This session is open to anyone with an interest in multiple loving relationships. As well as an introduction to the many ways polyamory differs from monogamy, Lori and Amanda will discuss its relevance to and use in fiction narrative. There will be a chance to ask questions anonymously in this session, so no prior knowledge is required.

14th February 2013 – Lori and Amanda’s piece on polyamory, “Table for Three”, was published in Issue 2 of Geeked Magazine. Order your copy here.

Photo of Foyles window on Charing Cross Road, featuring Geeked Magazine and a table for three!

Photo of Foyles bookshop window on Charing Cross Rd, featuring Geeked Magazine and a table for three!

There has been much written about how dreary Valentine’s Day can be if you’re not in a couple. On 14th February every year you will notice that pretty much every option for a romantic night out is geared up for pairs of people. Well, to be perfectly honest, you’ll probably only notice this if you’re not one of two!

Two – no more, no less. Just as society has a bit of a problem with anyone who actually wants to remain single, they can’t quite get their heads around why anyone would want to share either. Those of us who are polyamorous may have any number of people they’d love to spend Valentine’s Day evening with but, if the number in our group isn’t divisible by two, making a booking for this particular date can be rather tricksome.

Is this because the monogamous majority simply don’t understand how we could possibly love more than one person at the same time? Yes, proper romantic love. The type of love where you’re bowled over with passion at the start and then, after a while, you just couldn’t imagine life without them.

2nd October 2012Amanda spoke about polyamory on 4thought.tv – Watch the video here.

Most mainstream religions teach us to commit to one person in marriage and that happiness comes in the form of a stable married life with healthy children. Yet growing numbers of people in the UK are choosing to live alone or to redefine what it means to be part of a ‘normal’ relationship. This week 4thought.tv asks, “Is it a sin to be single?”

16th June 2012 – Amanda ran a session on dealing with the media at Polyday in London.

For better or for worse, open relationships, polyamory and ethical non-monogamy are pricking the ears of the press at the moment. From the commission of a new reality TV show on the matter, to recent features in The Independent, The Guardian, on ITV and Radio 4 Woman’s Hour – many of us are being contacted for comment. For anyone who would be interested in speaking out but isn’t quite sure or is keen to discuss how, as a community, we raise our profile in a constructive manner – a beginners session on dealing with the media.

16th April 2012 – Amanda spoke about open relationships and polyamory on Woman’s Hour. Listen to the clip here.

Can open relationships ever work and how do you negotiate them? Jane speaks to Amanda Jones who is in a polyamorous relationship and the relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr.

6th April 2012 – Lori was interviewed about open relationships in The Guardian.

Lori decided to begin calling herself “polyamorous” – a term that means pursuing multiple consensual love/romantic relationships. It’s a subset of non-monogamy, the blanket term for more than one sexual partner. The term polyamory is only 20 years old, and has entered the lexicon because it emphasises love: it’s much more socially acceptable to talk publicly about multiple loving relationships than multiple fuckbuddies. The polyamory movement is driven by grass-roots activists – around 200 people appeared at London’s PolyDay last August.

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